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Community Corner: If Union players were teachers, what would they teach?

Inspired by a recent Doopy Brothers segment

Giving credit where it’s due, this Community Corner post is inspired by a recent episode of the Doopy Brothers, where AJ, who is a school teacher, and Luke discussed what different Philadelphia Union players would teach or positions they’d hold if they worked at a school.

They were self-deprecating about how the segment went, but I thought it was a fun exercise.

You can listen to their picks around the hour mark of the episode.

Here are five picks from me. You can share yours in the comments.

Kacper Przybylko - Drama

Need I say more?

Warren Creavalle - Art

My most memorable art teacher from high school used to blast Jethro Tull records during class and get mad at any students who got too close to her record player. Warren Creavalle would be much cooler as a teacher. In fact, he already has some experience working with young kids in Chester in the after school program Design FC.

Brenden Aaronson - Geometry

It’s all about angles with Brenden, whether he’s splitting defenders with a pass, weaving his way through the box, megging a goalkeeper or closing down a player in the press.

Ray Gaddis - Civics

While fans love to debate about Ray Gaddis’s contributions to the team, it’s impossible to argue his presence as a role model in the locker room and as a citizen and human being. When the Union finally returned to individual training in Wilmington, Gaddis got permission from the team to delay his return so he could be part of an organized effort to push for police reform in Indianapolis in the wake of the George Floyd killing. He’s continued to use his platform to speak out and is one of the leaders of the Black Players Coalition.

Joe Bendik - Librarian

Like school librarians, backup goalkeepers are in the background and mostly overlooked until the moment comes that they are needed and everyone quickly remembers who is next in the depth chart. Joe Bendik is definitely that guy for the Union since he still hasn’t even made an appearance for the team since arriving last July. (If we had done this a few years ago, Brian Carroll would be the obvious choice).

Philadelphia Union, Andrew Zwarych