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Poetry Corner Kicks: Union 1 - Red Bulls 3

Poetry Corner Kicks notes a similarity between the Union and an old joke.

Red Bulls head coach Jesse Marsch laughs because the Union remind him of a joke he once heard.
Red Bulls head coach Jesse Marsch laughs because the Union remind him of a joke he once heard.
Eric Hartline-USA TODAY Sports

Well, the Philadelphia Union are in last place. I once heard a joke that went like this: Q: What do you call a person who graduated last in their class in Med School? A: Doctor. The Union are technically a first-tier professional soccer team here in the states, but they are last in their class. To take the joke a step further, would you want that doctor operating on you?  Similarly, many people are getting frustrated at getting stuck with the Union’s lack of education, smarts, and ability. Here is the latest in a string of losses, recapped in rhyme to give you at least some degree of enjoyment.


Again the Union find themselves the bottom of the class
Another loss to rival foes reveals their standing: last

The Red Bulls in to get some points and get them really fast
The U obliged, their defense let the Red Bull players past

Union woes v. New York foes made quite a large contrast
The Worst against the Almost First were easily surpassed

Klejstan scored to start the goals his PK was a blast
The U were next but that was all the goals they could amass

Shaun the new guy did a dance and Gaddis was harassed
Bradley put the Red Bulls up from brother’s nifty pass

The U were done it was quite clear: the home team all but gassed
But Abang stuck the dagger in, the home fans were aghast

New York the better of the two, the Union were outclassed
"Bring up the rear!" could be their cheer in MLS’s caste