Zac MacMath was sent on loan to the Colorado Rapids earlier this week. That's bad. That's so, so bad.
The move will be beneficial for Zac, who has a good chance of starting at Dick's Sporting Goods Park. But for us--those of us still trapped in Philly--this is an unmitigated disaster.
The Union only have two rostered goalkeepers at the moment, which can mean only one thing: The day of reckoning is at hand.
Another goalkeeper will join the team in the near future, presumably. Whether he joins on loan, on a free transfer, or through the draft--dear god not the draft--unending torment will rain down on Philadelphia soccer from places like Salt Lake City, or Columbus, Ohio.
"LOL, of course the Union sign another goalkeeper," one says. "I don't think Philly knows that they can't play all three goalkeepers at the same time," tweets another. It will be hell, and we are totally undeserving.
John Hackworth made the decision to trade up for Andre Blake in last year's SuperDraft. It was a puzzling move at the time, considering that MacMath was a young, average starter on the up-and-up, but not too much commotion was made about it. Then July happened and everything went to shit.
Rumors of a Rais M'Bolhi signing were quickly laughed off, but those laughs slowly turned into booming sobs. Ridicule poured in like never before, as we all searched for shelter. The jokes just kept coming, though, and they got worse and worse by the day.
Some twitter users, so worn out from months of making terrible goalkeeper-related one-liners, could barely form coherent zingers. One tweet, which reads: "Mbowli couldn't even catch cold," got three retweets and seven favorites. A Facebook post declared that the Union would use Lionel Messi, the Barcelona striker, as a goalkeeper. It was met with many "likes" and a "HA!" or three.
Though there were still a few cracking some jokes, the whole ordeal sort of faded. Then in a three-day period, the Union did not protect either MacMath or M'Bolhi in the Expansion Draft, and goalkeeping prospect Zack Steffen spurned the Union for the Bundesliga. The jokes were back, though it felt as if they were never gone, just waiting for the right time to re-surface and ask if one of the goalkeepers was going to play striker.
Now, a week before the draft, here we sit. A veritable case of PTSD just waiting for a trigger. Who will it be? Will it be experienced Jon Busch? Or will the Union opt for a lower-profile third-stringer like Brian Perk? Or (please no please no please not this one please) will the Union trade up for a goalkeeper in the draft for the second straight year?
What will you do on the day of reckoning, when disaster comes from afar? To whom will you run for help? Where will you leave your riches? Probably in the Union's goal because they'll have three go--God smites me so damn hard